Baby news....

So, I just found a stack of Christmas cards that somehow did not get sent, so if you didn't receive a Chrismtas card from me, just assume that yours is in this stack that I'm too embarrassed to send out this late, and feel the love.   We sent our Christmas wishes and announced the exciting news that I'm expecting and due this June.  We should find out in a few weeks what we are having, so stay tuned!

I have not been good at journaling at all this pregnancy, so I'm going to take a few minutes to journal about this pregnancy.  I'm not posting this for sympathy, just for record-keeping purposes (and to remind me to NEVER do this again.....kidding!).  I'm not going to lie, it's been super tough.  I thought I had it bad with Sienna and thought THAT was what I was signing up for, and this has just been so much worse.  I've had constant 24-hr/day nausea (and occasional vomiting) from the minute I wake up  until the minute I close my eyes at night. With Sienna I felt pretty good in the morning and the nausea didn't really kick in until around 11ish, so I at least had some relief.  I definitely wasn't prepared for this.  The nausea started even earlier this time--around week 4-5.  I'm now almost 17 weeks and still feeling really awful.  I've tried just about everything to get relief--preggy pops, ginger chews, vit b6 and unisom, zophran, phenergan, gingerale, sprite, even acupuncture.  I really haven't found anything that seems to help--oh, other than Diet Coke.  Pretty funny, since I haven't had soda in about 13 years.  My Diet Coke addict friends are loving the fact that I always seem to have a diet coke in hand.  It doesn't seem to do a whole lot, but it does a little something.

Needless to say, I've been just counting down the days until I should be feeling better.  With Sienna nausea ended around week 18, which is just around the corner.  When I was pregnant with Sienna after the morning sickness ended I had about a week of feeling great, and I remember going running on the beach and just loving life, then at week 19 I started getting these horrible stabbling/ligament pains when I walked.  They lasted until I delivered.  I remember my MD that it was just how I carry and she told me that they would started earlier and be more painful with each pregnancy, and wouldn't you know it--they showed up last week (week 15ish).  So, it's definitely been a double-whammy, having the morning-noon-and-night sickness and the ligament pains.  Let's just say that I have sucked at life for the last 3 months....and just ask Dan, it's been a LONG 3 months--for all of us.  

I'm just not good at this pregnancy thing.  And I am definitely not one of those who suffers in silence or who does this gracefully.  I'm sorry for those of who who have had to be around my miserable self the last few months.  I really have felt like I am just barely surviving.  It's hard to feel like you are just doing the bare minimum in every aspect of your life.  I just feel like I'm a horrible mom, wife, friend, employee....the list could go on and on. I'm so grateful to live in a time where I have Mickey Mouse and Dora to help raise my child.  And I'm grateful that she's young enough to not remember what  waste of a mom I was for these few months.

I have so much admiration for women, for mothers, especially for those who struggle through trial after trial during their pregancies.  Pregnancy is just not for wusses.  I keep saying that this kid better be cute (therefore being worth the trouble)!  And then I get scared that maybe Sienna got all the cute genes.

I know that this is all temporary, and that it's worth it, and that I have so much to be grateful for.  But, that doesn't mean I have to like every bit of it, though, does it?  I am grateful for this new adventure and excited for what the future holds.  Can't wait to meet this little one.  I have a feeling he/she is a strong, feisty little one who is just showing me early on who is boss! :)